I'll Fill You In Later

3parts:

kamidoodles:

caspertheholyghost:

iamnobird:

kamidoodles:

lywinis:

abrokenfishbowl:

sherlockedandnotginger:

onlyslightly:

Fixed it.

Give this ALL THE NOTES please.

Thiiis

To the guy:

To the girl:

ALL THE AWARDS.

A post-modern point of view for all of you modern-thinking people out there.

Let’s start with Boy:

• Boy is simply stating his opinion.
• Boy is allowed to have his opinion.
• Boy has his own definition of what is slutty.
• Boy finds slutty-looking girls unattractive.
• Boy messes up by using “boys…” as a plural/general term rather than “I…”

Now, moving on to Girl.

• Girl is stating her own opinion.
• Girl is allowed to have her own opinion.
• Girl has her own definition of what is slutty.
• Girl apparently thinks she herself dresses in a slutty way (otherwise, Boy would find her “desirable”). 
• Girl is, what, angry that one boy on the internet probably won’t find her attractive?

This post, as a whole, is aggravating and rant-inducing. I (a girl) actually might find Girl’s picture more offensive than Boy’s. Why? Because Boy states his opinion (granted, he generalizes boys, which is annoying and inaccurate due to being a generalization), whereas Girl attacks Boy. Whatever happened to #RespectMen? Why can’t we #RespectEveryone? Even those with differing opinions. Why can’t we look at things in more of a positive light? (i.e. Not immediately thinking negatively of a person who feels like people demean themselves by dressing slutty-like. Because, really, if you think about it, Boy is looking out for girls. Yes, he does it clumsily, but his basic argument is sound and meant well.)

If you read all of that, thank you. I appreciate your patience and interest in my thoughts.

i dig it, but i also think that they both have good points in their own way, but are both being douchebags about it, in their own way. Opinions may vary.

I’m probably opening up a can of worms here, but I’m just going to state that while “opinions” are all well and good, they can be wrong. “Opinions” based on bigotry can be wrong. “Opinions” based on misinformation can be wrong.

We can break this down, like above:

Boy’s picture:
- Boys don’t want to date slutty girls: Let’s take a look at the word “slutty” first. I’m going to presume here that the connotation is “boys don’t want to date girls who are sexually promiscuous.”

Problem #1: There is a problem with demonising sexual promiscuity. It leads to misinformation and ignorance and above all, shame.  When people are ashamed of sex, they don’t ask about safe sex practices. When people are ashamed of sex, they don’t buy condoms or other forms of birth control. They don’t educate themselves about sexually transmitted infections. It creates problems, and makes things unsafe for everyone who engages in sexual activity. Ignorance, misinformation, and shame prevent responsible action.

Problem #2: Tying in with demonising sexual promiscuity is demonising sex workers. Not all sex workers are such because they are desperate; not all sex workers are such because they’re drug addicts or disease-ridden. A sex worker is a person, and no less than than such. “Boys don’t want to date sluts” - you know what that implies? That sex workers are undesireable. That they are not relationship material. That, for the sole reason their profession involves sexual activity, they are not wanted.

- “#RespectYourself”:

THE PROBLEM: Sexual promiscuity (or being a sex worker) does not mean that the person has no self respect. Like, really. What makes you think that “slut” = no self respect? Some people enjoy sex. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that.

——————————————-

So yeah. Sure, the second picture might be, on the surface, more “offensive” because she’s flippin’ the bird. Yeah, they’re both “opinions”. But the boy’s opinion is much more harmful than the second opinion. Plus, it’s based on a lot of ideas that are rooted in rape culture (blaming women’s manner of dress and/or behaviour for their problems [including but not limited to rape]), which is very, very harmful and is something that we as a society should strive to eradicate.

His basic argument is not sound. He may “mean well”, often the people who “mean well” are those who do the most harm. 

Reblogging for Kami’s awesome response.

Personally? I’d be interested in someone who is comfortable with their body and their sexuality, and who understands that current social mores are designed to hurt and shame anyone who doesn’t fit within a very narrow worldview. I would not be interested in someone who buys into that bullshit and decides that hurting and shaming people is a good way to find a partner.